Inhale-able Pumpkin Muffins (without a story)

I have no clever story to add, I’ll just say my 5 year old daughter declared she wants to eat these *every single day* in her lunchbox, except Wednesdays, which are pizza days. There are more proper ways to make them, and healthier, but these are easy and soooo delicious. You can do subs, like lowering the butter to 1/2 c or subbing coconut oil. If you lower the fat, also use a bit less flour, by about 1/4 cup. You can also lessen the sugar by 1/2 cup and they’ll still be yummy, but healthy isn’t my goal here. Deliciousness is.

Inhale-able Pumpkin Muffins

Makes 24

Ingredients

• 2 cups AP flour
• 2 cups granulated sugar
• 1 (15 oz) can pumpkin purée
• 2 large eggs
• 1 cup butter, salted (or add 1 tsp salt)
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 1 Tbsp cinnamon
• 1/2 tsp cloves
• 1/2 tsp nutmeg

In a large bowl, melt the butter.

Add pumpkin purée and sugar, mixing well

Add eggs and mix well.

While mixing vigorously, add baking powder and baking soda. (To do this the proper way, you would sift it into the flour first. I have 3 small kids and little free time).

Add spices, mix well.

Lastly, add the flour and mix well with a wooden spoon.

In either an oiled muffin tin or baking cups, fill 2/3 full. Bake at 350 degrees for 22 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out (mostly) clean.

ENJOY!! Please let me know if you make these and enjoy them as much as we do.

Christians and In Vitro Fertilization

In Vitro Fertilization?  Intrauterine Insemination?  Embryo Transfer?  Blastocysts?  Hormone Injections?  Collection Rooms?  What’s a Christian to do?

All valid questions.  This National Infertility Awareness Week, I encourage you to #ListenUp and I’ll try to answer some of them.  Like the majority of mainstream America, I grew up hearing about ‘test-tube babies’ – babies conceived, I assumed, in little glass tubes here they began growing until? I don’t know – they were too big for the tubes?  It sounded like science fiction.  Like, DANGEROUS.  People start to envision the Matrix at the very mention of such things.  And for good reason.

Especially as Christians, we constantly weigh modern medicine and science against the scale of Scripture.  Is it God-honoring?  Does it lead down a dangerous path?  Is there a way a Christian can possibly go through infertility treatments and still be, well, Christian? 

The answer is yes.  And also no.  The truth is that the answer will be different for everyone, because everyone’s situation is different.  But especially if you’re a parent, friend, fellow churchgoer, or pastor of a couple going through infertility treatments, I want you to listen up, because there are some things we don’t talk about that need to be clarified.

‘Collection Rooms’ Do Exist

But that doesn’t mean you have to use them.  This post isn’t to criticize anyone who’s gone through the, ahem, traditional route, just as a form of education.  Collection rooms are a thing.  From what my Reproductive Endocrinologist told me, they have plenty of ‘material’ for the men to provide their ‘samples’.  A lot of couples going through treatments choose to go this route, especially as it’s the only real option mentioned by most RE’s and OB’s.

When I told my RE we were Christians and I wasn’t on board, she looked at me like I had a third eye.  She almost used her mommy voice when she started to inform me (in front of my husband) that ALL men do it and I would probably need to get comfortable with the idea for the sake of my marriage.  It’s a good thing I was already a strong-headed 33 year old at the time of this conversation, because I laughed her off.  MY husband?  No.  And don’t you dare try to act like our sacred relationship is unnatural.

So, on to the options.  You can either take charge and be a part of the process (I know this is TMI,  for the sake of educating Christian couples considering this), but be careful, because saliva cannot mix in with the semen, or it will damage the sperm.  There are also special collection condoms created specifically for safely catching the sample in a sterile way.  My RE also wasn’t thrilled about that idea, as it changed their normal protocol, but went along with whatever I insisted, since we had gotten to know each other pretty well by that point!  They can be used for the collection of samples for testing, as well as for IUIs and IVF.  Also, studies have shown that semen collected in this more natural way tends to have a higher sperm count, better motility, and more normal morphology.  Win-win.  I personally like the idea of a husband and wife still uniting in the marriage bed for the process.

Embryo Transfer Doesn’t Look Like the Matrix

I know that embryo transfer sounds weird and sci-fi and scary, and it IS a little crazy!  But what you may be envisioning as an embryo transfer probably looks more like the picture in the heading and less like what it actually is at this point.  After fertilization in a petri dish, embryos are left to divide and grow in a warm place for a few days.  Embryo transfers usually take place in the US on either Day 3, the morula stage (about 8 cells), or Day 5, usually a blastocyst by then.  This is what a blastocyst looks like:

And while I would never argue that it’s worthless at this point, or that it’s not human life – I believe in the sanctity of human life at every stage – I think it’s important for the sake of conversation to know exactly what we’re talking about here.  That small group of cells inside the trophoblast – the embryoblast – is the inner cell mass that will become the embryo.  In a day or two, after implantation (hopefully) occurs – the trophoblast will emit hormones that irritate the uterine lining and cause it to be able to burrow into and attach in the lining.

The events over the next couple of weeks in the life of an embryoblast are actually incredibly fascinating, and worth looking into if you’re truly interested.  https://embryology.med.unsw.edu.au/embryology/index.php/Main_Page  So, it becomes even more evident to me that this process is not something that can JUST be achieved with modern medicine.  This is LIFE.  This is that one God-breathed thing taking place, still being knitted together in secret, in the deepest places of a mother’s womb.  It does have a little help.  Some people aren’t comfortable with that, but I believe that most people that are really educated on the process don’t find it to be the dangerous evil they once thought.

‘Extra’ Embryos

You know, this is a valid concern, truly.  And one that bothers almost every IVF patient, even those who are pro-choice, after they’ve achieved their desired family size.  I’ll be open and honest here.  In almost every IVF procedure, they collect as many eggs as possible.  They fertilize as many of those eggs as possible, and they attempt to help as many as possible make it to the morula stage or blastocyst stage.

For some women, they end up with 16 eggs, 4 of which fertilize, and none of which survive to transfer.  Some have 6 eggs, all fertilize, and all make it to transfer.  The majority of us have an average number (say, 12-16) of which about 3/4 fertilize, of which usually about half make it to a transfer stage.  And yes, we have all kinds of emotions and questions about the ones that don’t make it that far.  For me, that meant 4 embryos total made it to transfer.  The exact number of embryos chosen to transfer immediately depends on a number of factors – the age of the woman at the time of the egg retrieval, how many cycles she’s had prior, and her health if she were to carry multiples.

For the sake of continuing, we chose to transfer two on our first try at IVF and cryogenically preserve the remaining 2.  Two weeks later, we found out the cycle was a success (YAY!) and we were pregnant with twins.  Now, we were faced with what to do with the remaining two.

We had really only wanted A BABY,  and while we were over the moon that there were two, we had no plans on a family of six at this point in our lives, so we began to search for a Christian couple looking for an embryo donor.  There are embryo ‘adoption’ agencies, that literally charge thousands of dollars to prospective parents to ‘adopt’ embryos, not actually a legal requirement yet, and there are also just listing sites where you can read through profiles of couples looking.

We wanted a Christian couple who seemed like they had a strong marriage and a real love for life and the Lord.  We found the absolute PERFECT couple, and then things got real.  Turns out, I can’t possibly stand the thought of another couple with ‘our’ babies.  Just can’t do it.  Breaks my heart.  Makes me cry.  Wrenches me in two.  Would regret it all of my days. All the feels. Sooo…two years, 12 days after the twins, their baby sister was born and we couldn’t imagine life without her.  BUT, we have a dilemma.  Still have one more embryo!  And at this point, it feels impossible to go back and go through the ordeal again, with two 3 year olds and a 1 year old, but it feels impossible NOT to.  It is definitely a real situation that couples going through infertility have to face over and over, even if they’ve already ‘beat’ infertility and have a healthy baby!

Christian couples considering IVF need to sit down and have a real conversation about what happens to those extra embryos.  And they should realize that how they feel about it prior to the process may be completely different than how they feel about it holding one of those grown-up embryos in their arms.

Contributing to the Industry

Okay, so, I get it.  There are some sketchy things, from the perspective of a person of faith, that can go on in the embryology labs.  In vitro fertilization is often used by unmarried or same-sex individuals specifically to achieve pregnancy outside of biblical marriage.  There are controversial things (like egg donation and sperm donation) that may cause some Christians to raise their eyebrows, not knowing if that’s OK or not.  I can’t help you with that one, I haven’t done any research on it.  And my husband and I spoke at length when we began infertility treatments about what’s OK for us and what’s not, because we never want to be ‘the ends justify the means’ sort of Christians.  But…we DO want to be Christians led by the Holy Spirit.  Christians that know God and listen to Him.  That are willing to call it all off if we feel a stirring.  If God isn’t in it, I don’t want it.  So, we did a lot of praying.  And at least for me, I am 100% confident that I honored the Lord in our IVF.

I know that some are concerned about contributing to an industry that does some questionable things.  But by that line of thinking, we would apply that to everything.  Yet, you’re reading this on a computer.  On the internet!  Flooded with questionable content even in your email inbox the second you turn it on.  You benefit from modern medicine and their questionable means in a myriad of ways.  So, as Christians, we have to ask if it’s OK to use the positives, in industries that also have negatives – and I think that answer might be different for different people.  For us, it was clear that following some guidelines we prayed about and insisted on sticking to made it possible for us to truly feel we honored the Lord in our infertility journey.  We couldn’t be more thankful for His hand in knitting together our three beautiful babies as only He can.

 

I know this post hasn’t been a play-by-play on the IUI or IVF process, but my hope is that I’ve at least begun to open a dialogue whereby those that were silently criticizing Christians wo go through IVF at least feel like they have an understanding.  It’s probably not appropriate (do I even need to say this?) to ask others about their infertility journey, but I welcome questions about mine.   Please, share away – especially for your pastors, counselors, and friends – and #ListenUp when your friends are facing the truly devastating blows of infertility.

 

 

Single Superheroes?

So, I saw a bumper sticker today that read, “Single Moms are the Superheroes”

Really?  I’m not knocking single moms, or any other moms, for that matter.  I know that A – people make mistakes, different decisions, some adopt, and some are left by the fathers of the children for reasons beyond their control.  But are they “the” superheroes?

I know a mom who had 2 children with her husband and several years of her life invested.  They’d been having marital issues and he started a relationship with another woman.  This mom valued keeping her family together enough that she found it in her heart to forgive him, asked him to come back home, prayed for him without ceasing, worked on their relationship together and have a thriving marriage several years later.  Not only she and he, but also the kids, benefited from that.  I think she’s a superhero.

My own mom was a single mother.  Although the courts awarded my dad custody of us until I went to live with her when I was 13, which I know had to be sooo hard for her, she was a great mom.  She taught me the value of hard work, loved me unconditionally, encouraged my passions and helped me thrive, despite our difficult circumstances.  She raised my nieces and nephew and has cared for her mother with Alzheimer’s for almost 15 years.  I think she’s a Superhero.

I also know a mom who has adopted at LEAST 10 kids (I’ve lost count), most of which have special needs to one degree or another and would have spent their entire childhood in foster care, and probably their adult years as wards of the state, had she and her wonderful husband not stepped in to LOVE them and care for them.  She’s definitely a Superhero.

I know a Mom of 6 who homeschooled her kids and made it look easy.  One of the most patient, calm women I’ve ever known, and I learned a lot from her about keeping the calm in the midst of the storm.  She’s a Superhero.

And then there’s the Mom who had high hopes and dreams of being a SAHM for her kids, but when her husband’s pastoral position didn’t provide health insurance for their family, went back to work as a teacher even though it broke her heart to leave her kids every day.  She’s doing what her family and her husband needed her to do, even though it wasn’t what she planned.  Superhero indeed.

Finally, the Mom who went back to school to work on her doctorate and show her kids that they can, indeed, succeed at whatever they set their hearts to, regardless of how insurmountable the odds seem at first.  Superhero.

So, no – Single Moms are not “the” superheroes.  They can be, though – just like any other Mom who sets her heart and mind to loving and caring for her children above all else.

SHOULD WE ALL JOIN THE UNION?

I saw a post in a VO thread this morning wondering why all the rest of us voiceover pros don’t join the Union (SAG/AFTRA).  The basic premise was that rates are being pushed lower by subpar talent and cheap, drive-thru …

Formula Doesn’t Make Me a Bad Mother

I guess I said it all in the title of the post…but I suppose I could elaborate a bit.

When I first became pregnant, I was all in for breastfeeding.  I called my insurance company and ordered a pump, I read books, articles, and blogs on breastfeeding twins.  I was a regular visitor to the La Leche League website (complete with fancy sketches).  I had every intention in the world of exclusively breastfeeding my twins for at least the first 9 months of their lives, and I joined the ranks of women who look down on mothers who formula feed (gasp!)

Then, the babies arrived.  6 weeks early, no less.  In the NICU, they immediately started giving them bottles to put weight on them.  I worked with the lactation consultants at the hospital, some of whom were very wonderful, some of whom were….ahem…not.  I not-so-fondly-recall a LC literally grabbing my breast and shoving it into the mouth of my newborn preemie daughter the second she started rooting.  Very uncomfortable for us both, although I’m sure I enjoyed it the least.  My friend tells a story in the hospital of the LC going “Squeeeeze it like a Biscuit!”  Where do they get these analogies?  And WHO squeezes biscuits?  I’m from Kentucky, practically the biscuit capitol of the country, and everyone knows you have to be gentle with biscuits.  But, I digress…

So, I struggled to produce enough.  I pumped, yes.  A lot.  Not as much as I needed to.  Yes, I used Fenugreek.  Yes, I was committed and loved my babies.  Have you ever tried taking care of TWO premature newborns while power pumping?  Not easy.  So, after 3 months of not producing enough, I QUIT!!!  You know what?  They still seem fond of me.  They’re still growing quickly, still smart as can be.  We’ve still bonded.  I’m not knocking the benefits of breastfeeding – trust me – the amount of nursing I did, I truly enjoyed the connection with my twins.  But, can we please stop this area of Mommy Guilt?

In honor of stopping the mommy guilt, I will share with you a modern invention that has CHANGED MY LIFE.  The Baby Brezza Formula Pro Mixer.  I cannot stress how much of a help this has been.  Some people think it’s lazy to not just shake a bottle, but they don’t know what in the world they’re talking about.  I used to spend AN HOUR every night washing and preparing the bottles in the fridge for the next day.  So, I’ve compiled a list of why this is awesome:

• Less wasted formula.  With the formula mixer, I’m not preparing 6 or 8 oz bottles ahead of time for a baby that may only want 4.  I can put 4 in, knowing I can easily and quickly go back and add another 2!
• Fewer dirty bottles.  Because I have twins, I can use a bottle, then go back for a refill for baby #2.  If you use Dr Brown’s bottles like I do, you know this is a big deal.
• No waiting for the bottle warmer.  At 3am with 2 crying babies, fixing a couple of bottles in 30 seconds is huge.
• Correct temperature and consistency every time.  Need I say more?

Now, here are my tips on using the Formula Pro, because like everything else, it isn’t perfect.

• Every couple of bottles, pull out the funnel and wipe it down, as well as the opening above it.  Powdered formula can clump and collect there if you don’t, then you won’t be getting enough actual formula with the water.
• Remember to empty the water container regularly and clean it.
• If it beeps when you’re making a bottle, go ahead and take the time to refill it.  Your brain isn’t functioning properly right now.  You’re sleep deprived and you’ll probably forget.  DO IT NOW.

Experiences with breastfeeding or formula feeding you’d like to share?  This is a “mommy guilt”-free zone.

Be looking for another post on how I wrangle the Dr Brown’s bottles for the dishwasher.  Yes, I have a method for everything.  😛

So, Your Baby Won’t Sleep?

Let me preface this by saying that I’m technically not a baby sleep expert.

Okay, here’s the thing:  Now that my twins are 9 months old, I’m basically a baby sleep expert.  🙂

There are SO MANY things I wish I’d known in the beginning, things I’d read but didn’t necessarily believe, things that sounded too good to be true, that sounded sweet, stressful, too hard, too harsh, and just right.

The fact is, I had to learn as I went what worked and what didn’t, and I really hope that this post can help you, New Mom, with your baby’s sleep problems.

At night, when it’s getting close to your 3 month old angel’s bedtime, he gets super cranky and starts screaming.  Nothing you can do will stop the screaming.  You’ve tried rocking him, putting him in his swing, anything and everything and NOTHING WORKS.  Troubleshooting: First, it sounds like your little one might be OVERtired.  That means, you’re waiting too long to put them to sleep.  Start watching for subtle sleepy cues, like becoming more quiet or calm than normal, eye rubbing, yawning.  Don’t wait until they start crying to put them to sleep or it’ll be too late and your night will be ruined.  Okay, not ruined.  

Have you heard of the 5 S’s?  I thought it was hokey, too, it looked waaay too simple.  Somebody posted this Youtube video from The Happiest Baby on the Block on FB and it looked like a trick to sell books.  Which it is, I’m sure.  But, here’s the thing…it actually works.  What are the 5 S’s, you ask?

• Swaddle – I like the Halo swaddlers because they worked out of everything else.  Yes, they will cry when you first swaddle them because they don’t want to calm down and go to sleep!  Do it anyway.  You’ll see that they sleep better and longer for reasons I’ll detail below.
• Side – Turn them on their side and hold them close to you.  This can be toward or away from you, preferably on their left side in case they’re having gas issues.
• Shush – In their ear, as loudly as you need to, Shhhhhhhhh, Shhhhhhhhhh, Shhhhhhhhhhh, Shhhhhhhhh OVER AND OVER AND OVER….
• Sway – Rock or sway back and forth, side to side, etc.
• Suck – Offer a pacifier or bottle.  That’s technically how they put it.  I call it, holding in the pacifier and wiggling it until they realize they actually want it and give in.

Sleeping Formerly Cranky Baby after the 5 Ss: 

These aren’t effective unless you do ALL of them at the same time.  Now, the Shhhh thing can be tough and although it’s annoying for YOU to listen to, here’s a rough file I made for my babies and shared with other Twins Mom friends:  https://dl-web.dropbox.com/get/Public/sLEEPsOUND.mp3?_subject_uid=109917573&w=AADKiseFsfWL68YHAmAtT6RMxycxnFRmUE03ofR75rX23w

You’re welcome.  And I’m sorry.

Here are some more tips:

• USE A WHITE NOISE MACHINE in their room.  Not music, a white noise machine.  This one works well.  http://www.amazon.com/Sleep-Easy-Sound-Conditioner-Machine/dp/B00GFSF402/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1420658189&sr=8-4&keywords=sleep+mate+noise+machine
• Try a Rock N’ Play Sleeper instead of a flat bassinet or Pack N’ Play.  My babies slept so much better in them.  The incline helps with reflux and they feel secure and cuddled in them.  They slept in the RNP sleepers, swaddled, with a white noise machine like a CHAMP.
• SWADDLE – Swaddling not only helps your angel feel secure and fall asleep, it helps muffle their startle reflexes, which tend to wake them.  Swaddled babies sleep better through their light sleep periods, also AND are easier to transfer because the swaddle helps hold them still.  Again, I like the Halo swaddlers.  Everything else, blankets, the Summer Infant swaddle sacks, etc., they wiggled out of.

Happily Sleeping Swaddled Babies – 

• Sleep Begets Sleep – Keeping your angel awake during the day won’t help them sleep better at night.  It’ll make them feel like crap, give them headaches, and stress them out, raising the cortisol in their body and making it harder for them to go to sleep and stay asleep at night.  Lay them down for naps when they’re tired and let them sleep as long as they need to.
• Baby Cereal in the bottle doesn’t work – I wish it did, trust me.  The reason our moms think it worked was because around the age we could start having cereal, we also reached a developmental milestone that helped us sleep in longer stretches
• Sleeping through the night usually isn’t ALL NIGHT – If your baby under the age on 1 is sleeping in 5-7 hour stretches, you’re golden.  Sleeping through the night is usually more like 6 hour stretches.  Currently, my 9 month old twins sleep from 7 pm – 8 am with 1-2 feedings in between.  I’m much more concerned with them being able to go to sleep when they’re tired than with my not having to wake up a couple of times to feed them.
• If you think they have gas, give them Simethicone – Simethicone drops are safe enough for a day-old baby.  Even a premature day-old baby.  They aren’t absorbed by your body and help break up gas bubbles.  Safe enough to use at every feeding and cheap, too.  Go ahead.  The dosage for a baby under 2 is .3 mL.  I didn’t even have to look!  HAHA!
• If you have the room for it, make bedrooms for sleeping only.  This will help it become a part of their sleep association.
• I know this is controversial, but look into sleep training.  I swore I wouldn’t do it.  After 6 years of infertility, I’d be happy to rock and cuddle and hold and sing and Shhh for hours a night if I had to.  Somewhere along the line, I realized how miserable my babies were with not being able to go to sleep and I had to do something about it.  I did a modified version of crying it out, called the Ferber method, after reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Twins.  It took 2 days for them to get the hang of it and I’m sure it was much harder for me than it was for them.  Details below.

At around 5 months, I swaddled the babies, laid them in their cribs, turned on their white noise machines, kissed their litte heads and walked out of the room.  Oh, it was torture.  All the tears…. Mine, not theirs.  As I said, much harder for me.  You see, they DID cry.  More like complain.  However, I realized that they cried for about 15 minutes before they went to sleep as opposed to the hour and a half they would have if I’d interfered.  I realized within a couple of days that if I went back in to comfort my son, he’d get ramped up again.  My daughter, however, needed a pat and a paci if she didn’t calm down within 5-10 minutes.

I hear horror stories from other Moms with babies the same age as mine that never get any sleep.  They spend all their time at night trying to rock them to sleep (while the babies cry, mind you!) or watch them collapse, overtired in their playrooms.  I might sound like a jerk to some people, but I’ve pretty much got this baby sleep thing figured out and my life is so much easier, my babies are happier, etc.  For the last several months, it’s been pretty much like this:

It’s bedtime.  Babies get PJs put on, get kisses and hugs while I talk about it “being bedtime”.  Take them upstairs, one at a time.  Lilli usually gets 2-3 minutes of rocking and cuddling before bed because she likes it.  Lay her down, give her a paci (I LOVE Wubbanubs) and turn on her crib soother.  White noise playing, blackout curtains in place with a nightlight.  This is usually around 6:45 or 7.  Tell her I love her, goodnight, walk out of the room and close the door.  Get Liam, who does not tolerate nighttime cuddles because he knows what you’re up to thank you very much.  Take him to his room, talk about bedtime up the stairs, in bed, turn on crib soother, kiss on the head and goodnight, leave the room.  Babies asleep within 5 minutes with minimal fussing.  Yes, it can be done, ladies and gentlemen.  Where was all this useful information when my nephew was small?  They usually fuss a bit 45 minutes to an hour in and then settle back in to sleep.

Has something else worked for you?  Think I’m a know-it-all jerk?  Have a question?  Comment below!

I Guess There’s 2

Hello, Dear Reader!

Thanks again for taking the time to check out what’s new in my world today.  Well, it turns out there are TWO new things in my world, not just one.  That’s right, after my first ultrasound to check out baby’s growth and heartbeat last week, we saw not one, but TWO healthy babies and strong heartbeats.  That’s right, the woman who tried for 5 years to conceive a child is expecting TWINS.  Both embryos implanted, both are growing.  It’s almost too much for me to believe.  If I wasn’t assaulted by unending all-day so-called ‘morning’ sickness, it wouldn’t even feel real.  But the growing intense pressure in my abdomen and the constant nausea (I’ve lost 2 1/2 lbs) are quite convincing, if the ultrasound wasn’t.  I’m so darn excited, I can’t hardly believe it.  I want to tell strangers in the grocery store.  Sometimes, I do.

Last week, this guy comes up to me in a line at a gas station Subway and starts hitting on me.  “Hey there, you’re awful pretty, that dress looks great on you!”  So I respond, “Thanks!  It’s my pregnant-with-twins-but-not-quite-big-enough-for-maternity-clothes dress!”  He says, “Wow, if a guy was hitting on you that would be really awkward.”  To which I, not letting it die, respond, “Hopefully, that would only be my wonderful husband.”  Him: “I’d better get out of here.”

I thought it was pretty funny, although I kinda felt bad for the guy, but the truth is probably just that I like telling people now.  Pretty soon, I’m gonna need maternity clothes, and then I won’t have to tell anyone.  They’ll be asking me when I’m due, and I’ll say, “Oh, not for another 6 months!” and they’ll think I must be crazy.  HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Also, I keep having all these random questions running through my head about what to do with twins.  Do you feed them both at the same time?  What about bathing?  Will I put them each in their own little baby bath in the tub, or strap one in a car seat while I wash the other?  Will I be able to feed them both, or be forced to give them (NOOO) formula?  Too many unanswered questions!  What about beds?  I know in the beginning there will be one bed, but when do I move them to two, and should they share a room since they’re twins, or should I encourage putting them in separate rooms early?  I know I’ll figure it all out as I go, but my brain is trying to figure it all out NOW.

Anyway, lots of excitement going on here!  We’re going to double our current family size by the time next summer rolls around.  Now, granted, I have 2 beautiful, wonderful, well-loved stepkids – but they’re 18 and 20, and don’t live at home anymore.  So that’s different.  So many changes, so little time.  I think I’m going to go take more Zofran, talk at you all later!!!

Feeling Pregnant

Okay, there’s been a lot going on since that positive, or BFP as we call it in the world of infertility treatments.  I’ve had 3 beta tests – that’s where they draw your blood and see if the baby’s growing as it should.  My first beta was at day 15 past retrieval, and it was at 272!  2 days later, it was somewhere around 650.  Yesterday, on day 21 past retrieval, it was at 3,604!  So, it’s quite high, although it could still be a singleton.  I don’t know how I’m going to get through these next ten days until the ultrasound without losing my mind!  I just have to know!!! 1 or 2?  Omigosh, I’m just so darn excited either way.  

I also actually FEEL pregnant now.  What does that feel like, you ask?  Well, I have hints of morning sickness.  Light abdominal pain, frequently – and I’m completely STARVING all the time.  Everyone keeps telling me obvious things, like to eat protein to stave off hunger.  I’m telling you, I can eat a ribeye and be hungry 30 minutes later.  I’m trying here.

This may be TMI for those not going through IVF – so I apologize in advance, but my doc said my progesterone was high enough that I could switch from the nightly intramuscular injections to an…ahem… alternate method.  You ladies know what I’m talking about, right?  I said, no thanks – I’ll stick to the injections.  One and done.  If my hips get too bruised I might change my mind.  But, you know what?  I only have to do them another 5 weeks, and I think if I’ve held off this long, I can make it.  BRING IT ON!!!